"Yazisa Onakho: Ungakubonga Kanjani?" yisihloko esibalulekile esenza sicabange ngokubaluleka kokuqaphela nokwazisa izinto ezinhle esivele sinazo ekuphileni kwethu. Ukubonga kuwumkhuba osisiza ukuba sibone uhlangothi oluhle lwezimo, sazise izimpumelelo ezincane, futhi silondoloze isimo sengqondo esihle lapho sibhekene nezinselele. Kulo mongo, ukufunda ukubonga kusisiza ukuba sihlakulele isimo sengqondo sokuchichima, sandise injabulo yethu, futhi sithuthukise ubuhlobo bethu. Kulo mbhalo, sizohlola amathiphu namasu okuhlakulela ukubonga ezimpilweni zethu zansuku zonke.
Imuphi umusho ofaneleka kakhulu wokuveza ukubonga ngendlela eqotho neqotho?
Ukubonisa ukubonga ngobuqotho nangobuqotho kubalulekile ekuhlakuleleni ubudlelwano obunempilo nokuqinisa izibopho ezingokomzwelo. Umusho ongadlulisa lokhu kubonga ngokweqiniso uthi: “Ngiyabonga kakhulu, ngokusuka ekujuleni kwenhliziyo yami.” La mazwi alula, kodwa anenjongo, abonisa ukwazisa ngalokho okwenziwe noma okwamukelwe, ebonisa ukuqaphela nokwazisa. Kubalulekile ukukhumbula ukuthi ukubonga kudlula amazwi futhi kufanele kuhambisane nezenzo eziqinisekisa lo muzwa. Ngakho-ke, zijwayeze ukubonga nsuku zonke futhi wazise konke onakho, ngoba ukuphila kwenziwa ukuthinta okuncane okwenza umehluko.
Ukubaluleka kokubona nokwazisa izibusiso ezikhona ezimpilweni zethu.
Phakathi kwesiphithiphithi sempilo yansuku zonke, sivame ukukhohlwa ukuma futhi sicabange ngazo zonke izinto ezinhle ezisizungezile. Sigxile kakhulu ekuzuzeni okwengeziwe, sifuna njalo isinyathelo esilandelayo, kangangokuthi asizinaki izibusiso esezikhona kakade ezimpilweni zethu. Ngakho-ke, kubalulekile ukufunda ukwazisa lokho esivele sinakho, ukuba yikho ngiyabonga kubo bonke abancane nabakhulu amadlozi ezisizungezile.
Lapho siqaphela futhi sizazisa izibusiso ekuphileni kwethu, sihlakulela umuzwa wokubonga osilethela izinzuzo ezingenakubalwa. ngiyabonga isisiza ukuthi sibone uhlangothi oluhle lwezimo, sibhekane kangcono nezinselele futhi sigcine a isimo sengqondo esihle ngaphambi kokuphila. Ngaphezu kwalokho, i- ukubonga Kuqinisa ubudlelwano bethu, njengoba kusenza sibe nozwela, siphane futhi sithande abantu esiphila nabo.
Lapho thina sigxilisa ingqondo ezibusisweni ezikhona ezimpilweni zethu, nathi sikhulisa okukhulu ukuzihlonipha e ukusiqhenya, ngoba siyaqaphela ukuthi sibusiswe kangakanani nokuthi sinekhono elingakanani lokubhekana nezinselele ezivelayo. ukubonga isisiza ukuthi sixhumane nesimanje, ukuze siphile lapha futhi manje ngamandla nangokugcwala.
Ngakho-ke, kubalulekile ukufunda indlela yokwenza ukwazisa lokho esivele sinakho, ukuba yikho ngiyabonga kwabo bonke izibusiso izipho ezimpilweni zethu. Hlakulela i ukubonga kuwukuzivocavoca kwansuku zonke okusilethela izinzuzo ezingenakubalwa ezingokomzwelo, ezingokwengqondo, ngisho nezingokomzimba. Ngakho-ke, yima isikhashana, ubheke okuzungezile, futhi inani abancane amadlozi okukuzungezile. I ukubonga iguqula izimpilo zethu futhi isenze sibone umhlaba ngamehlo acacile ithemba e okuhle.
Ukubaluleka kokubona nokwazisa izinto osuvele unazo empilweni yakho.
Ezweni lapho sihlala sigcwele izikhangiso ezisitshela ukuthi sidinga izinto ezengeziwe ukuze sijabule, kulula ukukhohlwa ukwazisa lokho esivele sinakho. Ngokuvamile, sigxile kakhulu kulokho okusashoda ekuphileni kwethu kangangokuthi asiyeki ukwazisa izinto ezilula, eziyigugu esinazo kakade.
Ukuqaphela nokwazisa izinto esesinazo kakade ekuphileni kwethu kubalulekile ukuze sihlakulele umuzwa wokubonga nokwaneliseka. Uma sigxila kulokho okushodayo, sidala umjikelezo wokunganeliseki njalo, sihlale sifuna okwengeziwe, ngaphandle kokuzizwa sanelisekile. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, ngokwazisa lokho esinakho kakade, siyakwazi ukuthola injabulo ezintweni ezincane nezikhathi zansuku zonke.
Ngaphezu kwalokho, ukwazisa izinto esivele sinazo kusisiza ukuba sibe nombono omuhle nokhangayo. Uma sizijwayeza ukubonga, maningi amathuba okuthi sihehe izinto eziningi ezinhle ezimpilweni zethu ngoba sikhipha amandla avumayo aheha ukubukeka okuhle. Kufana nokuthi silungisa ukudlidliza kwethu ezintweni ezinhle esifuna ukuziheha.
Ngakho-ke, kubalulekile ukukhumbula ukwazisa kanye nokubonga ngezinto esivele sinazo ezimpilweni zethu. Bonga ngempilo yakho, umndeni wakho, abangani bakho, umsebenzi wakho, kanye nemvelo ekuzungezile. Funda ukwazisa izikhathi ezincane zenjabulo nobuhle ezintweni ezilula. Ukuzijwayeza ukubonga kusisiza ukuba sigcine ukulinganisela ngokomzwelo, sandise injabulo yethu, futhi sihehe izinto ezinhle eziningi ekuphileni kwethu.
Ungalindi uze ulahlekelwe okuthile ukuze ukwazise. Bonga futhi wazise izibusiso osuvele unazo empilweni yakho. Bonga futhi ubuke impilo yakho ishintsha ibe ngcono.
Ukufaneleka kokubonga: kungani kubalulekile ukukuveza ezimpilweni zethu zansuku zonke?
Ukubonga kuwumuzwa onamandla ongaguqula izimpilo zethu zansuku zonke ngezindlela eziningi. Ukubonisa ukubonga kubalulekile ngoba kusisiza ukuba sibone futhi sazise izinto ezinhle esinazo ekuphileni kwethu, kunokuba sigxile kulokho esintula kuphela.
Lapho sizijwayeza ukubonga, siyakwazi ukwazisa izinto ezincane ezivame ukunganakwa, njengokushona kwelanga okuhle, uthando lomngane, noma ukwanga othandekayo. Lokhu kusisiza ukuba sigcine a isimo sengqondo esihle futhi uhlakulele umuzwa we ukwaneliseka ezimpilweni zethu.
Ngaphezu kwalokho, ukubonga kuyabuqinisa nobudlelwano bethu. Lapho sibabonga ngobuqotho abantu abasizungezile, siyababonisa ukwazisa e uthando kubo, ukudala izibopho ezijulile nezinengqondo. Lokhu kunomthelela kokuningi ngokuvumelana e okuhle ekusebenzelaneni kwethu kwansuku zonke.
Ngakolunye uhlangothi, ukuntula ukwazisa kungasenza sizizwe singaneliseki futhi singaziswa. Uma sehluleka ukubona izibusiso esinazo, sizifaka engozini yokuwela emjikelezweni we ukungabongi e ukungabi nandaba, okungase kuthinte impilo yethu engokwengqondo nengokomzwelo.
Ngakho-ke, kubalulekile ukubonisa ukubonga ekuphileni kwethu kwansuku zonke. Kufanele sihlakulele umkhuba wokubonga ngezinto ezinhle ezenzeka kithi, ngisho nasezikhathini ezinzima. Ukubonga kusisiza ukuba sigcine umbono omuhle kakhudlwana. ngokulinganiselayo e okuhle, okusikhumbuza okubaluleke ngempela futhi okusishukumisela ukuba siqhubekele phambili nakho ithemba e ukubonga.
Kwazise onakho: Ungabongwa kanjani?
Lesi sihloko simayelana nokuzindla sibonge futhi sifunde ukwazisa esinakho Abanye abantu baphila ngokushesha okukhulu futhi abaqapheli isimo sabo esihle kangangokuthi bakhohlwa ukuzwa ukubonga ngesiphetho sabo sokuzalwa esimweni esithile nasendaweni.
Izigidi zabantu emhlabeni wonke zimpofu kakhulu. Abaningi bahlala emigwaqweni futhi bahamba izinsuku bengadlile. Nokho, abantu abaningi abahlala emazweni aseNtshonalanga, abanengcebo, amathuba amahle, nezinto eziningi ezithokomele, abakwazisi lokho abanakho.
Ezinye izibalo:
- Izingane ezimpofu kakhulu emhlabeni zinethuba eliphindwe izikhathi ezingu-2,7 lokuba nochwepheshe abaqeqeshiwe lapho zizalwa.
- 1300 billion abantu abampofu emhlabeni.
- Amazwe angama-20 ampofu kakhulu emhlabeni atholakala ezwenikazi i-Afrika, aholwa yiRwanda, Guinea, Benin, Tanzania, Ivory Coast, Zambia, Malawi, Angola neChad.
- Bangaphezu kuka-60% abantu emhlabeni abahlushwa ukungondleki.
- Ingane wesilisa eyazalwa ngo-2012 ezweni elinemali eningi kulindeleke ukuthi iphile ize ibe neminyaka engama-76, okuyiminyaka eyi-16 kunengane ezalelwe ezweni elinemali encane (iminyaka engama-60).
Zindla ngobuhle bempilo. Bheka izinkanyezi uzibone usugijima nazo. – UMarcus Aurelius.
Umthombo omkhulu wenjabulo yikhono lokubonga ngaso sonke isikhathi - uZig Ziglar.
Ukuthambekela kokungabizi
Abantu bayizidalwa ezivamile, futhi ikakhulukazi emazweni aseNtshonalanga, sivame ukukhohlwa nokubukela phansi ukubaluleka kwempilo nengcebo yethu. Angikhulumi ngezigidigidi; ukuhola nje ama-euro angaphezu kuka-600 kakade sekungaphezu kakhulu kwabantu abayizigidi eziyizinkulungwane ezingu-1300 abaphila nge-$1 noma ngaphansi ngosuku.
Nokho, lokhu kuthambekela kuyashintsha lapho ulahlekelwa okuthile okubalulekile obunakho (nakuba kwaze kwaba yisikhathi sokulahlekelwa ubungazi ukubaluleka kwayo): lapho ilungu lomndeni lifa, lapho silahlekelwa umsebenzi wethu, ikhaya lethu, impilo yethu...
Ngokwesibonelo, umngane othile oyisazi sokusebenza kwengqondo muva nje ukhulume ngendaba yowesifazane ocebile owathola ingozi ehlasimulisa umzimba. Kusukela ngaleso sikhathi kuqhubeke, eneminyaka engama-60, waqala ukubona ikusasa lakhe, futhi manje intokozo yakhe enkulu iwukuhlala abuke abantu nezindawo.
Lokhu kuthambekela kuhlobene nekhono lethu lokuzivumelanisa nezimo nokujwayela izimo ezihlukahlukene zempilo. Bathi abantu basheshe bajwayele izinto ezinhle, kodwa kancane kancane bajwayelane nezinto ezimbi. Isibonelo, sijwayele ukusebenza, ukuhlala ekhaya elinethezekile, ukuba nomndeni...
Eqinisweni, ukukwazi ukuzivumelanisa nezimo ngokushesha kuyazuzisa kakhulu. Isibonelo, uma uya kwelinye izwe ngomsebenzi, uzokuthola kuyinzuzo enkulu ukuzivumelanisa nezimo ezintsha ngokushesha.
Pho yini inkinga?
Kunokuba ukhononde ngokuthi yini engalungile, bonga okulungile. - UJoel Osteen.
Inkinga ukuthi izimo ezinethezekile, njengokuthola umsebenzi, indlu, umlingani, umndeni, azisoze zaphakade futhi futhi, ukungakuqapheli lokhu kukwenza ungabongi, okukuvimbela ukuthi ujabule.
Lezi zimo ezikahle zihlala ziphela ngezikhathi ezithile: kushona ilungu lomndeni, indlu iyalahleka, umsebenzi uphelelwa, iholo elifanayo alitholakali, umbhangqwana uyahlukana... Ngakho-ke, kutuswa ukuba usebenzise ngokugcwele.
Kungani kunzima kangaka ukwazisa esinakho?
Ngokusho kocwaningo lwe-Positive Psychology, lapho into enhle ifika ekuphileni kwethu (isb., umsebenzi omuhle), siyajabula, nakuba le njabulo ihlala cishe izinyanga ezintathu ngokwesilinganiso.
Ukubonga kweqiniso akukhona okuhlangenwe nakho okungokomzwelo okunikezwa ngokuzenzekelayo, futhi ukumane ube nesizotha akufani.
Njengamanje siphila emphakathini othanda izinto ezibonakalayo lapho sivame ukukholelwa ukuthi izinto eziningi esinazo, ziba ngcono. Lokhu kuholela ekuqhathanisweni nasekukhohlweni konke esinakho—ngoba sihlale sifuna okwengeziwe.
Ukuziqhathanisa nabanye kubi ikakhulukazi, njengoba kukhuthaza umona, ukuhaha, nokuntula ukubonga ngoba asigxili kulokho esiyikho nalokho esinakho.
Mhlawumbe udinga ukufundisa okwengeziwe ezikoleni ukuze ubonge ngempela futhi ungasho kakhulu ukuthi “ngiyabonga” ngaphandle kokwazisa lutho.
Indlela yokubonga kakhulu futhi ukwazisa lokho onakho
Enye indlela yokunqoba umkhuba wokugxila ezimweni zethu ezinhle futhi sibonge kakhulu ukuzijayeza ukwazisa noma ukubonga.
Ungakwenza lokhu:
- Ukucabanga nsuku zonke ngazo zonke izinto ezinhle onazo empilweni yakho.
- Bhala uhlu lwazo zonke izinto ongazibonga.
- Prakthiza ukuzindla Vakashela lesi sihloko ukuze ufunde mayelana nezinzuzo zokuzindla.
- Zijwayeze Ukuba Nengqondo Vakashela lesi sihloko ukuze ufunde mayelana nokuqaphela.
Lezi ezimbili zokugcina—ukuzijwayeza ukuzindla nokucabangela—kuzokuvumela ukuba usiqaphele ngokwengeziwe isimo sakho futhi ujabulele isikhathi samanje. Ukuzijwayeza kwabo kuzokuvimbela ukuthi ungaphili usuku lwakho njengenjwayelo, uvele usabele futhi unganaki isikhathi okuso.
- Ukuba nakho phesheya
Ukuvakashela ezweni elimpofu kuzokuvumela ukuba ubone futhi ubone ubuqiniso besimo sakho. Ngiyaqinisekisa ukuthi umbono wakho womhlaba uzoshintsha—ngike ngaya emazweni amaningana ampofu mina. Ngingasho futhi ukuthi lokhu akukhona nje okuhlangenwe nakho komuntu siqu futhi kuphelela lapho, kodwa futhi kukukhuthaza ukuba ubambe iqhaza emisebenzini ebophezelekile emphakathini, njengokuvolontiya.
- Ukuba nolwazi lwamavolontiya
Ngokuvolontiya, uzobe unikela ngokuthile okubalulekile kuma-NGO adinga usizo, futhi ukuqhathanisa iqiniso lakho neqiniso labantu abanezinkinga zangempela kuzokumangaza futhi kukwenze ukhohlwe ngezinkinga ezingabalulekile.
Ingabe lesi simo sengqondo singagcinwa ngokuhamba kwesikhathi?
Kokuhlangenwe nakho kwami komuntu siqu, yebo, nakuba akufanele sikhohlwe ukuzilolonga eminye yemisebenzi. Uma usungene ohlelweni lwempilo yaseNtshonalanga nakho konke ukunethezeka kwakho, kulula ukukhohlwa ukubonga.
Izinzuzo zokubonga ngempilo
Ngokusho kukasosayensi uRobert Emmons , a ukubonga kunezinzuzo ezilandelayo:
Physicists
- Amasosha omzimba aqinile.
- Yehlisa umfutho wegazi.
- Amahora amaningi okulala kanye nomuzwa omkhulu wokuphumula.
- Ubuhlungu obuncane nokungaphatheki kahle.
Ezengqondo
- Amazinga aphezulu emizwelo eyakhayo.
- Isexwayiso esengeziwe
- Ithemba elikhulu nenjabulo.
- Ukuvimbela imizwa engemihle.
- Ukwandisa ukuzethemba. Vakashela lesi sihloko sendlela ongazazisa ngayo.
Social
- Yiba nesandla esivulekile futhi ube nobubele.
- Thethelela kakhulu.
- Uzizwa ungedwa futhi unesizungu.
Futhi ucabangani? Ingabe uyabonga futhi uyakwazisa lokho onakho? Nginentshisekelo embonweni wakho. Ngiyabonga.